I guess 2016 is the continuity of 2015. We're going deeper into introspection and what truly counts. The unessential is getting ripped out like it or not. Total transformation. And I thought I was doing okay. I was quite happy with myself. I realize now how far away I am. Not even close. 2016 is the time of the diminishing of the ego to it's right place. I thought I was spiritual but the self was talking. I was turning inward instead of outward. I guess it has to start with oneself but it can't remain there. Otherwise it is sterile. Close circuit. It doesn't light up the world and furthermore it can't change it. That's why charity is important and volunteering is important too. The visit of the sick. To get out of ourself belly bottom and to reach out for a soulful encounter. Go further than the material.
Go beyond
Be within stay above
Meditation
Looking back and asking for forgiveness. Stripping from the past that doesn't exist anymore. Focusing on the now. The ways of the past are over. Only the present is real.
I'm thinking, shrinking the animal soul is like going on a diet. At first, it is painful. It feels like a sacrifice. But soon, you get use to it and it doesn't hurt so much anymore. Getting rid of addictions. Moving addictions to positive habits. I was an addict and I will remain one. I made myself believed that I needed all sorts of things in order to be happy. It is not true.
To be loved. Can you beloved and be loved?
Love not to feed our own needs but love like sharing and giving. Like, I would give my life for him.
What's the meaning of life? Why Am I here? We are here to make the world a better place by bringing the divine light upon it. We are the interface between G-d and the earth. Our feet on the ground our head in the sky.
We are spiritual beings having a physical experience
We are not what we do for work, not what we have, not what we look like.
We are what we share.
Going into spiritual growth is the same as the athlete who trains harder and harder. It is the same discipline but on a different level. Pushing every day to be a better human not for me but for the others, whatever that is, the earth, the animals, the plants, the people, society, economic, politics whatever.
Not for our own glory but with humility.
Reason was always a word that distraught me. I was never a reasonable adult. I was wild. My life as an artist. For the first time, I truly feel I'm beginning to understand what true humility is. I realize how big an ego I had. The animal soul is all about me, myself and I. Which is good for the survival to a certain extent. What the animal doesn't know is when to stop. It's an eternal cycle without end but death. I will have to move in a week from by beloved apartment to a place, that I chose because it was the best for the price but not because I truly love it. Learning humility. It's a modest apartment, clean and bright but not luxurious, far away from it. Supposably, moving is the 5th most stressful event in someone's life. I have to come to a point where I feel that it is the love and the happiness inside a house that matters not the house itself. I'll have to make our kingdom, our temple. It is a virgin place without a history. This new story will start the 1st of May 2016.
It is about making place for the divine spark within us. The idea is to go within. When you love a person, you love the essence within that person. Love goes beyond the behavior or the physicality, love is a soulful encounter.
Simplicity, modesty were not part of my vocabulary. I loved the luxury because it is the quintessence of what is unessential. The events forced me to get out of my ego. They left me no choice. The material was keeping my soul prisoner. So now, that everything has been stripped, my soul can expand. I'll grow wiser and better. After all, the sky isn't the limit. Far away from it.
I seem to go from beginning to beginning. A little higher every time. Readjustment. I'm working on anger. Difficult task. But I'm becoming aware of it. Not easy to restrain from anger. I can't react to anger with anger. I am not a monkey. I have to take a moment and hold back. It's a time of forced readjustment. The idea is to accept. To accept forced readjustment as a new beginning. a blessing to do better. But I see it now all the changes that needed to be done. I can't pretend they don't exist anymore. I am so far away still. We live in a weird time. A time where sleeping around became the norm even as a couple, as long as they don't know it doesn't hurt, kind of philosophy. The only thing, we know. We can't hide from ourselves.
When man ate the fruit from the forbidden tree. And Adam and Eve were hiding. God asked Adam: where are you?
We have all sorts of excuses to make it sound completely natural and logic, aren't we animals, isn't it a natural need, sex is free, everybody does it. We lost the reason why sex exists because we are lost in the I and we forgot the We. There is no intimacy, everything is overexposed. I use to think they touch my body but they won't touch my soul. Disenchantment. Lost of innocence. We don't aim higher but lower. We think it is liberation but it is exactly the opposite. It's enslavement. And the cynical call the other naive, living in fairytales. But what is real is what we create. It all depends in which dimension we want to live in. Do we want to live slightly above the ground or do we want to elevate the mundane.
That is the ultimate question.
We have to be our own person. We can't follow the crowd blindly. We have to start to think with our own mind and feel with our soul. And live accordingly.
Be a dissident
